Dear Lianne,

I so appreciate your advice. It is helpful and to the point.

This is a tricky one. My ex and I split four years ago. It was like he had a secret life that I uncovered once he was gone. He drank, gambled, cheated and was involved in some pretty  bizarre sexual things. To meet him, you’d think he was a super guy and a great catch. So here is my dilemma. He started dating a woman who knows people I know. She has asked them to talk to me to see if I would talk with her about what happened in our marriage. I would actually love to so another woman is not fooled by him. How wrong would it be for me to have a coffee with her and tell her what she is getting herself into?

– Gwen

Lianne Tregobov
Intuitive Matchmaker

Dear Gwen,

I am so glad you enjoy the columns and thank you for your kind words.  I can appreciate how tempting it would be to want to warn all women about your ex. I have always said it would be wonderful if we lived in a society where ex’s wrote relationship references for each other that would be provided to potential partners!  Unfortunately, that will never happen.

I would assume the people you mutually know could provide insight to this woman without your involvement. It just isn’t right to sit down with her and spill the beans. I would imagine her Spidey senses are telling her that there is more to his story than meets the eye. Otherwise she would not be on a fact finding mission. She will need to discover who he truly is without your involvement. She should pay attention to her instincts.

– Lianne

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